You give a Rwandan a camera…

And you’re liable to be involved in a four hour photo shoot without your consent. That’s how I celebrated Hero’s Day in Rwanda, something like our Veteran’s Day. The morning started off innocently enough, I was reading the third book to the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy when one of the teachers approached my house and asked to use my camera. The previous week he and a bunch of teachers at my school had just graduated from the university and gotten their bachelors. I figured I’d be nice and let them use it and since I’d be there for the ride, what harm could come to it? The camera is fine. I’m still trying to piece together what happened. As best as I can remember it, this is how I spent four hours of my day:

As designated photographer I had the pleasure of taking everyone’s (some 10+ coming and going Rwandans and the occasional onlooker) photos in a myriad positions, standing, sitting, sitting in the grass, standing next to this tree, standing next to that tree, squatting, looking away, looking here, squatting over there, leaning against this, touching him, holding his hand, and that’s not to mention the costume changes (about three ties circulated for all the guys, never actually being fully tied or of the appropriate length, all skinny red ties, plus jackets/blazers, plus the graduation garb) and rearrangement of people for each position and costume. I forgot to mention, after each shot they would say, “And passport photo!” so for each standing shot there is a full body shot and a “passport” shot.

Side note: the Kinyarwanda equivalent to “cheese” is “salad”

After a while every single person agreed that they needed to get their picture with me. So I am now included in a fairly decent percentage of the 629 (not an estimate, an exact number) photos taken that day. Each picture taken of me is of course the full body and “passport” shot. Instead of using the zoom, which I demonstrated how to use several times, they would just walk close up, perhaps being a foot away and click.

This hasn’t even been the interesting part. That comes now.  After photo shoot #1, at what I learned to be some random woman’s house, we move into the forest. Though I live only a few kilometers from Congo I’m still technically in Rwanda, the land of 1000 hills, so it would only be fitting that the forest was situated on the side of a hill. Climb down, through the brush, into a thinly wooded but still uneven/hilly part to take the exact same photos as before, but this time contending with the awkward positioning of the sun, the trees, the hill, and the growing throng of children. I continue to get passed around like some white mannequin being propped up in different positions for the entertainment of store shoppers.

Like I mentioned earlier, this was to take pictures of the teachers who just got their bachelors. For some reason they ended up making me the center highlight of the forest photo shoot. I had to don a blazer and graduation robe then proceed to follow the customary Rwandan style poses for artsy poses, touching trees, squatting, standing awkwardly, not smiling for pictures, being passed around for all to get their picture with me like they paid their $5 to get a picture with Santa and tell him what they want for Christmas.  Luckily that was only like an hour’s time.

Photo shoot #2.5 involves me taking pictures in a field right outside the school for about 5 minutes with some teachers while we waited for others to catch up so I could take videos of two teachers wearing their robes (there were only two for 10+ teachers) walking. Nothing else. Just walking from the field into the school. I had long before this stopped asking questions and let my brain take a hiatus.

Photo shoot #3 lasted until right before sunset, which I’m convinced is why it stopped at all. All the same positions from the previous 2.5 photo shoots were again assumed, this time with different trees and a more level, though this time rockier, ground. This photo shoot took on a more Abercrombie & Fitch/American Eagle feel to it, though the Rwandan version alternatively keeps its shoulders and knees covered, lest people should get the wrong idea of them. Halfcocked head turns, backpack slung over one shoulder, sweater vest, jeans, and converse lookalikes. Stoic expressions looking off into the distance. Holding a soccer ball while leaning against a brick wall. More “passport” photos. At one point someone took off with my camera. They came back and I saw pictures of people doing awkward poses lying in the grass.

This last installment of the photo shoots, retrospectively, had the feeling of middle school girls taking myspace profile pictures but trying to make them seem candid, especially because as soon as the sun set we went inside to upload the pictures and look at them, all 629 pictures and 4 videos. At one point I questioned if I would run out of room on my 16gig memory card. The battery also almost died. Despite the super awkwardness of it all, which can be largely attributed to my general awkwardness probably, it was at least a bonding experience with the teachers. We got to hang out outside of the school setting and there was talk about drinking beer at some point in the future. I also got a lot of interesting photos to look at when I need a good laugh.